• STUDY: 83% of women suffer post-childbirth sexual problems

    (Yet we STILL don't want to talk about SEX!)


    No libido post baby? You're not alone. In fact, you're one of over two billion women experiencing the same problem. A study reviewed by Dr Terri Foran, Royal Hospital for Women sexual health physician, shows that nearly two-thirds of women experience ongoing sexual dysfunction six months post giving birth, with the common problems being orgasmic disorder, sexual desire dysfunction, sexual pain disorder and sexual arousal disorder.

    In reports about the UK study, Dr Foran is quoted as stating that 'sex and sexual problems are still something people are reticent to bring up.' She also discussed that they continue to see women with 'ongoing problems with pain, with issues around their libido, five, six, seven years down the track.'

    PASH Australia Founder and lapsed Registered Nurse, Jo Karabin commented: "As a mum of two, who experienced third-degree tears during the birth of both my babies, I know first-hand the challenges associated with resuming post-birth sexual relations.

    "I found that while there is great support about caring for your baby, there was little to no discussion, and certainly no information forthcoming, on how to re-engage with the sexual side of your relationship in a safe, non-threatening and, importantly non -painful way.''

    Many women experience vaginal dryness following birth due to hormonal changes which can affect enjoyment and cause additional pain. Studies show that women who breast-feed are more likely to report painful sex [2] and reduced libido, both due to hormonal changes.

    Jo continued, "Generally the advice is to wait four to six weeks before resuming sexual activity. But, of course, it depends on the level of vaginal trauma and how comfortable or ready the woman is in resuming activity. Many women are also uncomfortable with the physical changes that have occurred to their post baby body (we can't all be super models) and this can also impact their libido and self-confidence.

    "I'm so pleased that this study is being given some air time and finally raising the issue. In fact, one of the main motivators for creating PASH was to help women through this type of life challenge and I hope that through open discussion we can encourage women to seek help."

    Experts agree that the longer an issue goes untreated or addressed, the harder it is to treat.

    Jo Karabin also commented that she found it ironic that women ended up in the situation because they've had sex, yet no one proactively wants to discuss 'the topic' after the fact!

    "I personally find it so disappointing that it is still such a taboo topic when lack of intimacy can have such an negative impact on relationships, particularly when there are solutions that may help."


    Kegel excercises are designed to tone and strengthen the pelvic muscle. A strong PC muscle is the key to greater urinary control and more intense orgasms, as well as a host of other benefits.

    You can practice Kegel excercises on your own by flexing and holding the PC muscle, but Kegel balls, like the Je Joue Ami, can help to focus the efforts more precisely. The Ami Kegel Ball collection is a set of three silicone balls with a small ball inside and are designed to work in a progressive program.

    A strong kegel workout program can also help before a pregnancy to prepare the muscles for delivery (although we don't recommend that they are used during pregnancy).


    System JO is made in the USA using only the finest pharmaceutical grade ingredients available. All products are plant-based, safe, non-toxic and not tested on animals.

    JO Agape Lubricant
    E specially formulated for women and was created to be the perfect sensual solution for women with sensitivities. This moisturising lubricant offers all the benefits of a water-based lubricant in an extra gentle formula. Its pH balance is perfect for women to use alone or with a partner.

    ·         Viscosity mimics a women’s natural moisture

    ·         Glycerine, silicone and oil free

    ·         Specially formulated for women with sensitivites

    ·         Silky smooth, never sticky or tacky

    ·         Recommended by doctors

    JO Renew Moisturiser
    Replenishes the body's natural feminine moisture to reduce irritation and dryness. This all-natural long lasting formula is glycerin free, hormone free, odourless and non-staining. Perfect for daily use as an intimate moisturiser as well as a personal lubricant.


    PASH is an Australian company created in 2005 and is a previous BRW Fast 100 recipient.

    PASH is a company dedicated to empowering women through information, support and sensual products to help them live happier, more fulfilling sexual lives. PASH promotes positive sexual wellness for women through all life stages and distributes a range of sensual products.


    No matter what people say, there are no 'normal' responses – desire, interest and sexual activity can vary greatly, even in one woman over the period of her life. Factors such as children, work, money, family, age, hormone levels and ill-health will affect the sexual wellness of every woman at different times. Learning to cope and adapt to change is vital to maintaining a healthy relationship with a partner, and, importantly, yourself.

    There are some monumental life-stages such as post-baby, ill health, menopause and mature age that may adversely affect a woman's sexual wellness. Our goal at PASH is to help women navigate through the various options available for support, and to provide references for expert help that may be suitable.

    The PASH Mission: To help every Australian woman live a happier, more fulfilled life by supporting her sexual wellness needs throughout her life.


    The PASH Party Experience is an opportunity for women to get together to have open, honest adult conversations about the important topic of sexual wellness and how to enhance intimacy and relationships during all life stages. The PASH party provides inspiration and encourage to women.


    The PASH Yummy Mummy Experience is designed as a get together for new mums to share information and discuss not only their sexual wellness needs, but also issues and challenges they are facing, in a comfortable, nurturing environment. PASH offers a range of products to assist in sexual wellness and libido enhancement for women post-baby (and ongoing through her life).


    1. "Sex after pregnancy: Let your body set the pace". Mayo Clinic. 30 May 2008. Retrieved 2009-08-07.

    2. Barrett, G; Pendry E; Peacock J; Victor C; Thakar R; Manyonda I (2000). "Women's sexual health after childbirth". BJOG (Wiley-Blackwell/Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists) 107 (2): 186–95.doi:10.1111/j.1471-0528.2000.tb11689.x.PMID 10688502.

  • Book a Pash Party and learn why women are special

    Women are special. We menstruate, we have incredible emotional changes regularly and we get the lovely opportunity to have night sweats while we go through menopause. Of course with these experiences, we also can grow another human being, have boobs that can make heads turn and possibly have orgasms just by touching a tiny little area known as the clitoris.

    Over the last 15 years I have had the pleasure to work with thousands of women and share with them the glorious world of pampering products, bedroom accessories and relationship enhancement aides.

    During this time I have worked with single women, happily married couples, cancer fighters and survivors, women facing sexual health issues and even a few virgins! While each one of them have their own story and situation the one thing they have in common is that they embraced the opportunity to learn more about themselves.

    That is one reason why I encourage women to attend a ‘sex toy party’ such as a PASH parties. If done well, these parties provide women not only the chance to connect with their girlfriends but also to learn about their bodies, sexual health and become a more confident female. All of this wrapped up into a 2-3 hour party- what more could you want?

    A typical party includes a group of women who get together with a glass or two of bubbles in the comfort of someone’s home. The Consultant plays a game or two to make sure everyone is relaxed, and then gets into the ‘demo’.  This demo includes showing a variety of products and explaining the WHY, WHAT, WHEN and WHERE it should be used. The added bit of humour encourages people to laugh and not take anything too seriously, while the educational pieces helps bring awareness to aspects of their body or sexuality they may be unfamiliar with.

    These nights are designed to help women learn something they didn’t know- such as how to find the G-spot, why it is important to use lubricant during sex, how to increase your libido without a prescription and of course how to feel sexy and empowered. It is done in a tasteful manner and even if someone isn’t into the ‘love toys’ aspect of the party they won’t be made to feel awkward, in fact more often than not those who least expected it are the ones who buy the most product!

    If you are looking to get the girlfriends together, without the distraction of the men or children, I would recommend booking yourself a PASH party. You may be pleasantly surprised at what you will learn about yourself!

    Lisa Malnar

    Tough Love Advising

    Driving You Forward with the Truth

  • The Art of Seduction

    seduction with chocolate

    With Valentine's Day the next big day on the calendar, it's time to remember that not everyone has found love yet and some of those who have are simply trying to keep the fires burning! Learning how to seduce your new lover, or re-introduce the spark with an existing lover can be an exciting experience for all involved.

    The vital ingredients for successful seduction are confidence and playfulness: Be willing to step outside your comfort zone and become that sexy seductress waiting to burst forth from within (the good news is that it's easier than you think)!

    Here are our Dos and Don'ts for successful seduction:


    Neediness and seduction are mutually exclusive. The more desperate you are, the less attracted ot you your partner will be. The very last thing you want to do is make the person feel pressured. If you want to seduce someone who's quite independent, you may also benefit from learning how to tame a free spirit.

    • Even if you feel neediness coming on, don't give in. Think of it this way: Your needs will be met at some point down the line, but maybe not now. Delayed gratification.
    • Get a devil-may-care attitude when you're seducing that special someone. Be a little bit reckless (within reason): Do something a little risque or unexpected to keep them guessing. Maybe go out to the beach in the middle of the night. Or go on an unannounced trip for a couple of days. Try to cultivate a little bit of mystery.


    The more comfortable you feel, the more comfortable the other person will feel around you, and the more receptive they'll be to your affection.

    • Walk somewhere close instead of driving. Even just 10 minutes of physical activity can reduce stress and help you relax.
    • Listen to music that's proven to reduce stress, lower blood pressure, and fight an elevated heart rate.


    Smile, flirt, touch and tease. Don't be too serious, people enjoy having a good time. Have fun with this person. Enjoy the game.

    • Studies have found that a playful attitude makes people more attractive.[2]Playfulness in males signals non-aggression, while in females it signals youth and fertility.
    • Humour, too, is another crucial aspect of your personality that plays a role in attractiveness. A study has found that women are more likely to give their phone number to men who use humor[3], while men too perceive humour as being an attractive trait in women.[4]
    • Be able to make fun of yourself. People generally don't like other people who can't take a joke or get offended when anything bad about them gets said. Don't be that person. Be able to take criticism in stride. Hey, if you dish it out to other people (and you should; playfulness is attractive) you should also be able to take it.


    People enjoy being with other people who have exciting and interesting things going on in their lives, because they feel happy at the prospect of someone like that sharing their precious time with them. So what will you achieve if you are trying to meet with them or talk to them every moment? Nothing. It's best not to overwhelm the other person with your time, and let the relationship unfold at a more measured pace.

    • On some occasions, if a person asks you for a date, don't immediately agree. Say you'll check your calendar first, and then agree. Even if you have nothing going on, play it cool. That way, your social appearance will be enhanced by a simple trick.
    • That being said, fill your calendar with real events and real people. There's no substitute for the real thing. You'll actually be happier and feel more fulfilled if you're out and about than if you're sitting at home twiddling your thumbs.


    Move confidently. Most people are not attracted to wallflowers, but to people who are sure of themselves. Don't forget to smile and, if possible, make body contact when appropriate and not intrusive. Use eye contact - lock eyes with your partner or date to show you're engaged and interested.


    Leave something to the imagination. You should not share everything about you with the other person: mystery is always attractive. It makes people realize they don't know the whole you, and this secrecy will give off a seductive aura.

    Resist the urge to tell this person about your entire life story, and especially your parents. Not that parents aren't great; they're just not very seductive!

    Wait for their desire for you to catch up with your desire for them. Believe that it's only a matter of time, that they just need to discover how awesome you really are. If you don't believe that, then you can't seduce anyone. But the fact is that we naturally become attracted to anyone who we feel comfortable with, makes us laugh, and is slightly out of reach (because of the thrill of the unknown). It's human nature.
  • Embarrassing Sex Story

    Almost everyone we know has a hilarious, embarrassing or downright awful sex story up their sleeve.

    Whether it was woman in beda one-night stand gone wrong or a first time in the sack that left something to be desired, we’re taking a look at some of the funniest sex stories we’ve heard in a while. If you have one to add, make sure you leave us a comment! Click on the link below to check some funny stories.

    The pass-out princess

    I was so excited to go on a third date with this guy I really liked and figured this would be the night where we slept together. But I was also really nervous about it since I hadn’t been with a guy since my ex the year before, so I started drinking as soon as we got to the restaurant — and didn’t stop. By the time we got to his place and he was trying to get my bra off, I must have passed out in his bed! He was really sweet about it the next day and even teased me a bit, but my hangover combined with passing out on him really made me feel disgusting. At least I didn’t puke on him.

    Meghan, Calgary, Alberta

  • Do women want TOO MUCH sex?

    Looks like the government is finally doing something right - Tony Abbot is offering sex lessons for couples! Now there is a good use of tax payer funds if every I heard one...

    Ok, so Tony Abbott isn't actually personally giving the lessons (much to everyone's relief I'm sure), according to the Sunday Telegraph, Relationships Australia is running group sessions on 'sex and desire' under the government funded relationship counselling scheme.

    According to the article, the educators running the five-hour course have revealed that they have discovered that interestingly it is the women, not the men, who are complaining about the lack of frequency and quality of sex.  It would appear that the men are the ones under pressure to perform.

    Men and women generally view sex in different ways - men generally see sex as leading to intimacy, where as women tend to see intimacy as leading on to sex - and this can lead to a clash in expectations.

    The program that Relationship Australia runs looks like it is actually provide a healthy focus for couples on how to stay together by helping them develop their communication skills and, as a company dedicated to enhancing relationships, we applaud that.

    Having not indulged in such a course, I'm not sure what they relay to the couples in relation to products that can help with sexual dissatisfaction issues? If anyone has any experience in attending these type of courses, I'd love to know more.

    A key focus for PASH is helping reconnect couples by ensuring there is a sizzle in the bedroom. Our range of products are designed to help ensure BOTH partners stay happy - whether it is keeping the man harder for longer so she can have more pleasure or providing stimulating products that help her orgasm - there is something for every occasion. Of course, the fun is in the research!

    cuffs & eyemask

    Yours PASHionately

    Jo x

  • The Mysterious G-Spot Unveiled

    The G-spot is one of life's mysteries. Scientists and sexperts have been arguing over the G-spot for years but most now agree that for some women it does exist, and what we do know is that it can lead to amazing orgasms.

    But, of course, you need to know HOW to find it. So here's how to find your G-spot - and even if you don't, you'll have a lot of fun trying!

    What is the G-spot?

    The G-spot is a super-sensitive area found inside the front wall of the vagina. When it's stimulated, like the clitoris, it can bring you to orgasm quicker than just penetrative sex.

    Why is the G-spot so special?

    Deborah Sundahl, expert on female ejaculation and author of Female Ejaculation and the G-spot says, 'The G-spot has a unique orgasm, which is different from the clitoris. This is due to the fact that the prostate has a different nerve (pelvic) than the clitoris (pudendal), and therefore the G-spot has a different orgasmic sensation. This feeling is one of deep, melting love, and women love it!'

    Does every woman have a G-spot?

    Well, the jury's still out on this one, sexpert Lou Paget says, 'Yes, the G-spot exists, but every woman is different. For some it's an off-the-wall experience and others feel nothing. In the same way that some women have especially sensitive nipples and others don't.'

    Why do we have a G-spot?

    Some medical evidence suggests that the G-spot has a purpose other than to make you feel really, really good! Sexpert Emily Dubberley, says, 'Some scientists believe the G-spot can help ease childbirth because when the G-spot is stimulated the pain threshold is increased by up to 84%.'

    So if you're planning a baby any time soon, it could be worth investigating!

    Can the G-spot give you a guaranteed orgasm?

    'There's no such thing as a guaranteed orgasm,' says Emily, 'But knowing whether G-spot stimulation works for you is certainly a good thing - the better you know your body, the higher your chances of having an orgasm.'

    Is it true the G-spot can make you ejaculate?

    Recent research found that some women can ejaculate through sex, foreplay or by having their G-spot stimulated but it's different to the way men ejaculate - women do it before they orgasm. But don't get hung up on whether you are ejaculating or not. Sex and relationship psychologist Dr Petra Boynton says, 'Some men are convinced that if a woman doesn't ejaculate she hasn't had a 'good' orgasm. But this is often an idea that comes from porn and usually it's faked or it's just urine. If you're being made to feel inferior make it clear to him this isn't a turn on for you, instead show him what does work.'

    How do I find my G-spot?

    There's no harm in having a feel around yourself to see if you can find it.

    Inside the vagina there's a small patch of ridged, knobbly tissue about 2 1/2 - 5 cms. It's on the front wall of the vagina, so if you're lying on your back and you can feel it with your fingers, they would be pointing up to the ceiling rather than down to the floor. You should notice a rougher patch of skin in comparison to the smooth areas either side - bingo! You've found it.

    Or try this tip from Lou Paget:

    'Rather than lying on a bed it may be easier to be squat down and feel inside of yourself, but make sure you're a bit aroused first. Women's fingers can sometimes be too small or short to reach inside so a G-spot toy or a partner's fingers might find it more easily.'

    'It is possible to actually sit down in front of a big mirror on the floor, spread the labia lips, push out with the vaginal muscles and see the G-spot!' says Deborah Sundahl. 'You can see the ridges. I advise all women to take a look and get acquainted with this lovely female organ.'

    I can't feel anything!

    Don't worry, you're completely normal. Dr Petra says, 'You're not superior if you have a part of your vagina that feels good when touched, and you're not abnormal if you don't get turned on by having the G-spot/area stimulated - we're all different. And don't forget the other areas of the body that turn you on.'

    Are there toys I can use that will help me find my G-Spot?

    The appropriately named 'G-Vibe' is the perfect toy for starting the discovery journey. This exciting toy has motors in both tips, which perfectly conform to the female anatomy, including attention to the G-spot location. The unique feature of the G-Vibe lies in its unique simultaneous stimulation of the two sides of the vagina - G-Spot and the opposite side.

    G-vibe 2

  • What's next in sex?

    Just when I think I’ve seen it all (and believe me when I say researching products for PASH is an ongoing eye opening experience!), out comes a new product and I’m once again quizzically enquiring:  ‘Ok, so what exactly IS that and what do you do with it?’.

    My most recent education came with the launch of the Toynary Oral Sex Vibrator – a love toy for your mouth – which provides a stimulating oral sex experience.


    The Toynary is all about providing extreme pleasure for men! It is an innovative oral sex vibrating toy that you simply clip on the mouth, switch it on and give him an oral sex while it vibrates. It will completely change your partner's (and your) oral sex experience. This toy may be small, but it is mighty - it provides 3 vibration speeds, 7 vibration modes, 40 mins of vibration, it is rechargeable and waterproof.  If you’re not so keen on the oral vibrations, it can also be used in the hand.

    To be honest, I’m most impressed these days with sleek, aesthetically pleasing designs which are appealing to women, and the Toynary certainly fits the bill. Thankfully the days of the flesh coloured, veined phallic ‘styles’ are confined to the realms of dark and sleazy sex shops and less than desirable online stores.

    Thankfully, PASH customers tend to be more savvy – women know what they want and they actively seek out products which are higher quality, are made from safe materials and have high functionality.

    Of course with our ever curious generation ‘iTouch’ now turning into adults and seeking boudoir products that still meet their tech saavy minds, I’m predicting we will start to see a lot of cross-over with content in a virtual sense. Products that are embedded with chips that connect users – a whole new virtual experience awaits!

    Toynary available from RRP: $69.95 mouth

  • Baby Making Sex...the ultimate turn off.

    baby making face

    You would think a directive to have sex as frequently as possible would be heaven for most women and men, right? Welcome to the world of 'Baby Making Sex' and, if you've not been there, it's not quite the dream you might think.

    At the start, sure, it's fun and exciting but as the months roll on the monthly forced 'baby making' zone is approached with about as much enthusiasm as a pap smear.

    I remember it well. While we fell pregnant easily with our first, the second involved a rigorous schedule that I approached like a well structured project. The 'time of the month' took on a whole new meaning and I was emotionally charged - my poor partner, I'm not quite sure how he coped!

    Too much focus on procreation for a purpose (other than pleasure) can be off putting for both parties. The pressure to perform can be intense and can make the whole process an unenjoyable prospect. This, of course, doesn't help the overall cause which is structured around love making, which then puts even more pressure on the both of you. It can cause quite a strain. At a time like this, a strong healthy relationship is important. If things are not going so well, you need to work quickly to change the dynamics and get an uplift in the status quo.

    The first, and I think most important, thing to do is a mind-shift in the way you approach sex with your partner. One of the best ways is to remove yourself from your standard love making room, the bedroom - it's time to have a weekend off and go somewhere you both love so that you can reconnect. Before you go, refresh your bedroom so that when you get back after your trip you don't slip straight back into the negative mindset.

    The other key is communication. You need to talk to your partner about how you are feeling, it can really take the pressure off.

    I'm pleased to say that there is some good news! It turns out that an orgasm can actually facilitate pregnancy! Dr. Ava Cadell, spokesperson for The Experience Channel and renowned love and sex therapist, says that reaching orgasm is even more important in terms of baby making than the position you do the deed in itself. When a woman has an orgasm, her uterine wall contracts, and these contractions, in turn, have a vacuum-like effect, sucking the sperm up and moving them closer to the egg. "Since only 25 percent of women can achieve orgasm through intercourse, it's best to use a vibrator to stimulate the clitoris during penetration and help ensure one,” she notes.

    So whatever happens, you now have a qualified medical reason for your toy collection!

    Yours PASHionately... Jo x

  • To Vibrate or not to Vibrate…that is the question

    This week we have guest bloggers Maxine & Edwin of 'The Romance Guide'. We asked for their opinion both from a male and a females perspective on the use of love toys in a relationship - this is how they tackled the question that so many couples have faced…


    He Said…

    Ah, toys in the bedroom… where to begin?

    Well, I’d love to tell you that back when I was a young adult just starting my sexual journey I was comfortable using toys in the bedroom… but that wasn’t the case. I would also like to tell you that in my early 30s I miraculously got over all of my hang-ups and introduced toys into my sexcapades… but nope, that didn’t happen either. The truth is, it took me until recently to get truly comfortable using toys with my partner. A proverbial switch had flipped but it didn’t happen overnight.

    I met my beautiful partner almost three years ago. Early on I knew that she was a sexual being and that we were a good fit. I also realised that she loves it when I take the lead in most areas of our relationship, and the bedroom was no different. Now, the sex we have is great and I want to keep it that way. What I don’t want is “toasted cheese sandwich sex”. A toasted cheese sandwich will hit the spot every once in a while, but I don’t want it every day.

    At the beginning of our relationship, my partner mentioned that she had a “friend” under the bed for those lonely nights when I wasn’t around, which I thought was a bit of a turn on. It was around this time that I started thinking about adding some toy-play into our “adventures” but I found myself a bit unsure of how to proceed. Now, let’s be clear on something: I never really had a problem with the idea of toys per se; it’s not like I had any deep seated issues about this kind of stuff. The truth was that my knowledge around using them properly was dubious, at best. And yes, I have seen “movies” before, but that kind of knowledge without experience won’t get you very far when you decide to bust out a vibrator for the first time. I realize that all women are different and what works for one won’t work for another, so I decided to keep it simple and steer clear of toys. I guess what it really came down to was that I didn’t want my partner to know that I didn’t know what I was doing. Every time a discussion about using toys would come up I would get uncomfortable, but I knew I would have to figure out some way to change. I knew I would have to break out of the head space I was in if I wanted our sex life to continue growing.

    So, in my quest to change, I decided to take the bull by the horns and buy a vibrator for my girl as a gift. My thinking was that if I bought the thing that I’d be more comfortable with busting it out during sex and that somehow I’d turn into this vibrator wielding sex god. Yeah… not so much. What it did do though was help raise my confidence a bit more, which was a step in the right direction. Shortly thereafter, my partner and I played a sex game, which we really enjoyed. It was around this time that we started communicating more freely about not just the game and toys, but sex in general. And that’s when it all shifted for me. I was able to let go of the limiting beliefs I had around toys in the bedroom and our sex life has never been better.

    So, if there’s one thing that I hope you take away from this, it’s that of the importance of communication. I want you to be so very unlike me and not be embarrassed to talk to your partner about this stuff.  Don’t let your insecurities or hang-ups get in the way or you may just miss out on something special between the two of you. There’s so much fun to be had; another world to explore.

    Happy Rabbit The Happy Rabbit

    She Said…

    I’m gonna let you in on a little secret...I love having sex with my man.  I love how we create our own little world of sensuality and openness, where we explore each other’s bodies and minds.

    Part of that exploration has involved introducing toys and games into our repertoire.  I am a very sexual person and, as I was single for quite some time before I met my man, I had a vibrator to help satisfy my needs.  So, from the time that our relationship became sexual, he was aware that I had a “friend” to help me out when he wasn’t around.  And whilst it wasn’t a deliberate strategy to get him comfortable with the idea of using a toy when were together, I believe talking about it built up a level of familiarity and made it easier to move into “toy play”.

    As with anything in a relationship, the introduction of toys into our bedroom play was all about communication.  Ironically, we didn’t have a specific conversation prior to the first time using one together.  Looking back, I wish we had had that conversation because I think it could’ve waylaid his concerns sooner.  Taking the time to talk about how we will use it, what it means to him and what it does for me etc., would have allowed the two of us to get clarity on our needs and desires.  It would have also allowed me to convey that it was not about replacing him or anything remotely close to that (like I said…I am a big fan of him & his “manhood”), it was about enhancing sexual pleasure…for the both of us.  We’ve certainly talked about these aspects of toy play (and more) since and the great thing is that he has discovered that they can be fun and stimulating for him too.

    It’s interesting, you know, that after talking with my girlfriends I’ve discovered, generally, it’s the woman who initiates the exploration in the bedroom.  It is once that door has been opened that he gets creative and is open to delving further into the depths of sexual discovery with her.  I believe that this is attributed to the primal & innate hardwiring in the male brain, which dates back to caveman days, to protect his woman.  Given that as women, we are at our most vulnerable in the bedroom, it makes sense that men leave it up to us to open up the sexual space at our own pace.

    On the flip side, a large vibrator with its proud phallic appearance can be quite intimidating for a man.  I’m sure thoughts like “Why does she want that?”, “Am not enough for her?” & “What am I doing wrong?” have passed through many a man’s mind when it comes to vibrator play.  As such, I decided that it would be my man’s decision when to introduce my toy to our play.  Just as I want to feel a certain level of comfort in the bedroom, even when my boundaries are being pushed, my man deserves that same respect.

    So, as you can see, the ebb and flow of the ever evolving dance between our needs, wants & desires in our relationship does not preclude the bedroom. There isn’t a “one size fits all” approach for this situation, nor is it black & white, but many “shades of grey”….

  • Life's Ultimate Love 'Potion'

    PHEROMONES – Do they really work?

    Looking for love or just looking to keep your lover in love? We’d all love to wave our magic wand or take a pill and instantly be transformed into a divine sex goddesses.  Sadly, the experts haven’t quite managed to create the ultimate solution just yet, however, there is a natural solution to stimulating lust and desire in men…

    If you watched ‘Ocean’s 13’ you will have seen Matt Damon use a pheromone patch to seduce an older lady, the effect was dramatic. If only it was that easy! The reality is there is a lot of conflicting information on  pheromones, but  if you’re looking to become a man magnet, then read on.

    Pheromones – What are they?

    Firstly, pheromones are real and they can genuinely have an effect on your emotions.

    Pheromones are naturally secreted by men and women, as well as animals and other species. They are volatile, odorous substances which are released by one animal and detected by another, causing some sort of physiological reaction, including sexual activity.

    Pheromones are detected by humans through special receptors in the nose (vomeronasal organ) and once detected they travel through to the hypothalamus in the brain.

    The hypothalamus is quite special, it is responsible for producing emotions and emotional response. According to research, the pheromones are subconsciously detected and literally elicit an internal sexual response.

    Pheromones – How do they work?

    There is substantial debate around pheromones in the science community, but what we do know is that scientists have run clinical experiments and found that men can subconsciously pick up women human pheromones and become sexually attracted to the wearer. Unfortunately while pheromones can trigger powerful responses in men, women can rarely produce sufficient quantities to have a dramatic effect.

    Unfortunately the pheromones that women produce can be destroyed by deodorants or hormonal imbalances, so it’s a great idea to top up your pheromone levels to ensure you continue to attract. Also as you get older, your pheromone levels decrease, so using products that have added pheromones can give the kick to restore what you think you’ve lost.

    It is a well-known fact that we need to be psychologically inspired if we want our body to play its role. The wonderful thing about pheromone enhanced products is that simply the act of applying the products can help. Placebo or not, that alone can work to boost your sexy self- confidence.  If you think ‘sexy’, then you will feel sexy!

    Animals use pheromones to attract their mate, so it’s certainly worth a try – at the end of the day we are all just animals!


    PASH sells a number of pheromone enhanced products, but two of our most popular products are: Body Dew and Silky Sheets. While it can have the sexual attractant result, really it just makes people more ‘drawn’ to you.  Adding pheromones to your body will help get you a bit more attention and people will be nicer to you. It could also get you a few extra drinks while at the pub, so worth a try!


    Body Dew is a must have for all women. This after shower or bath mouisterising body oil will make you feel silky smooth while hydrating your skin all day.  After your shower or bath, while you are still damp, spray Body Dew all over and massage into skin (avoid face). This oil is fast absorbing so it will not get on your clothes (avoid silks until completely dried and absorbed).  You will not need to put on any lotion throughout the day as this is long lasting.

    Other fabulous uses for this product are helping your tan last longer (the more mouisterised your skin is the longer your tan will last). Body Dew also enhances the colour of tattoos by rehydrating the skin.

    It’s the perfect product for the Aussies climate because we tend to be really hot after a shower and can perspire while getting ready, making it more difficult to put on lotion.  Body Dew is great because your skin should be a bit damp when you apply.  Great for the girl on the go.

    *This product does not contain parabins or sulfates. No animal testing

    Body Dew


    Silky Sheets is a product with multi-uses. This powdered spray can be used as an air freshener, room deodoriser, and creates a satin feel on bed sheets. The Forbidden fruit scent will make any room smell divine and helps create romance in the bedroom.

    But the real amazing aspect of this product is that you can also use this product to help ‘dry up’ any beads of moisture, which means you never have to sleep in the ‘wet spot’ again!

    Silky Sheets

    Of course, I'd love to her all about your views on pheromones - so let me know what you think!

    Yours PASHionatley


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