Well known Australian author Kathy Lette has just released her latest book entitled' Best Laid Plans' about her autistic son Julius. She's a dedicated mother and when she talks about her son she coins a phrase I think is really poignant, 'As my son has taught me, there is no such thing as normal and abnormal, just ordinary and extraordinary.'
While the book is a work of fiction, in the book she talks about a real life scenario where Jules was desperate to lose his virginity before his 21st birthday. Desperate to help her son who, prior to this time had not had a girlfriend, she considered hiring a prostitute.
It's an interesting dilemma. Does everyone deserves the right to a happy, fulfilling sexual life no matter what their life circumstances? And if so, how as a mother, if you have a disabled child, can you help them achieve their desire?
I once watched a documentary on SBS about female sex workers that work with disabled people. One of the stories included a mother who had facilitated the union for her son who had severe cerebral palsy. It was a true sign of a mother's love. Mentally the son was just a young man wanting to explore his sexual side, but physically he was unable to procure that on his own.
There is good news for those mother's in that situation who want to assist - a charitable organisation called 'Touching Base' http://www.touchingbase.org/ which connects people with a disability with sex workers.
There are also trained 'sexual assistants' who also operate in this space that can provide assistance. https://www.myhandicap.com/en/information-disability-chonical-illness/relationships-and-sexuality/sexuality-and-disability/sexual-assistance-for-disabled-people/
Of course, no matter what the situation is, ensuring the person is educated about sex and ensures safe sex practice is important.
Yours PASHionately, Jo
https://penguin.com.au/books/best-laid-plans-9780593071366
